10 Things I'll Never Do Again

I gave my roommate a ride to school this morning. On the way I complained about one of my final papers that my teacher is making me rewrite (again). I said, in my usual sarcastic fashion, "Put that on the list of top ten things I'll never do again." She began to ask me what other things I would never do again, and I proceeded to think about it for the rest of the day. So here it is:

Top Ten Things I'll Never Do Again

1. Think that writing a paper about registered sex offenders would be "fascinating."
2. Waste two hours watching Napoleon Dynamite. 
3. Say "sounds fun" when someone asks me to go on short (a.k.a. three-mile) hike.
4. Believe the people at the bottom of the mountain that say they'll catch me when the zip-line ends.
5. Wear brand new flats to tear up carpet and remove wallpaper. 
6. Date a registered sex offender.
7. Tell a friend that I hate another girl so I can watch her tell that other girl. 
8. Take ceramics as my "easy" class of the semester.
9. Believe a guy when he says, "I didn't have time to call." 
10. Wear pink and red eyeshadow with sparkles and think it's hot.

You might think this is a little premature, making a list of the top ten things I'll never do again. But I still have the "Boy Was I Wrong List"; the "Things I Should Have Done but Didn't" list; and the ever-so-popular the "Stupid Things I've Said" list. 

Stay tuned.

xoxo,

Jessie